# Hinglish mein apni desires kaise share karein

In the 12 years I have practised, no phrase comes up more often than *"mujhe pata nahi kaise bolun."* You know what you want. You just don't have the script.

Here is the one I give every couple.

## Step 1: Name the feeling first, not the act

Start with "I miss feeling close to you" — not "we need to have sex more". The act is downstream of the feeling. Lead with the feeling and your partner will meet you there.

## Step 2: Own it with "main" not "tum"

*"Main chahti hoon ki hum aur physically close hon"* lands softer than *"Tum kuch karte hi nahi."* Same truth, different door.

## Step 3: Pick a time that is not mid-argument

Sunday morning chai. Not at 11 pm after the kids are finally asleep and you're both resentful.

## Step 4: Offer one specific thing

Vague asks lead nowhere. *"Kya hum Friday ko ek date plan karein?"* is workable. *"You should be more romantic"* is a trap.

## Step 5: Thank them when they try

When a partner makes the smallest gesture, say so out loud. *"Thank you for trying that yesterday, it mattered."* This wires the behaviour in.

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If Step 1 feels hard, start here: write it down first. A WhatsApp message to your partner at 3 pm is still a real conversation.